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At XXX Pwnage Adult Reviews, we interview outstanding individuals in the adult community - people who have influenced adult media in a positive, entertaining way, as well as newcomers who are gaining attention and fans. They're people who bring a strong point of view to the community with courage and often a lot of controversy that comes with following their own path. Mistress Caramel is one of those people: a talented blogger, adult reviewer and webmaster, who has deep insights into life, sexuality and society. So, here's my interview with this interesting and creative force to be reckoned with!

HW: Hi Mistress Caramel! Tell us a bit about yourself, your background in the adult industry, and what your blogs are about?

MC: Hi, Honey. Thank you for the interview. I love your writing and you're a big influence on me. I'm a 44 year old non-operative transsexual from Gainesville, Florida. I'm on hormone replacement therapy, for breast growth and a gazillion other feminine changes, but not seeking full sexual reassignment surgery. CaramelsTGirls.com is based on my transgender adult website reviews with links to transgender resources for ladies like me who read it. My blog basically keeps the public up to date on everything that's happening in porn involving crossdressers, transvestites, transgenders and transsexuals. I'll be adding webcam events and personal photo and video shoots as well in the Spring.

HW: I'm fascinated by your profile comment at your MySpace site: "I couldn't find her, so I became her." What does that phrase mean to you personally and why did you choose it?

MC: People ask me that all the time and I had no idea it would create so much interest. It basically sums up the time in my life when I didn't understand my gender identity. I really wanted to be a normal boy, but obviously things didn't turn out that way for me. When I was small, I'd draw dirty pictures with nude men and women, which is not abnormal for children, but I'd draw atleast half of the women with penises. I was old enough to know that women didn't have penises, or so I thought. If I knew then what I know now. When my parents would find my hidden drawings, I was scolded and beaten for it. As I grew older, I began experimenting with my mother's clothing. I was still a pre-teen and my secret proclivities would be found out more often than not. Eventually, I built a secret wardrobe of my own. I was always intensely attracted to females however and I lost my virginity to a girl who was the daughter of my parents' best friends at 14. I had my first experience with a boy my age at 15. My parents never found out about either sexual experience, but I got some major throwdowns with my father over my dressing in girls clothing. This had gone on for several years, but I moved away to college at 17. My contact with my father has been minimal since then. On orientation day at NUin Boston, MA, I decided to pick up the first pretty girl I thought I might like and took her to bed that night. She was a beautiful young lady and I've always had good luck with gorgeous women. I never thought I was model material, but I had a good personality. The sex was great that first night, but each time that followed became more and more kinky. I might be the last person to complain about kinky sex, but she wasn't into just spanking, but beating. I've always been dominant, but not outright sadistic and she was in need of serious professional help. After my short time with her, I met a transsexual at a party we had a one night stand. When I got home, I realized I didn't want to just be with her that night. I wanted to be her, literally. She was all woman to me; intelligent, beautiful, strong, confident and she had a cock. I still loved pussy but, but I found out for certain that first night that I loved cock too. But this relationship was doomed because there was no room in her life for two women. She eventually began dating men exclusively and there I was, alone and trying to figure myself out.

HW: At your MySpace blog, you've written an article entitled, "Is Tranny Offensive?" That term is all over the porn world now - what's your opinion about the word "tranny"?

6 out of the top 10 Google results for "tranny" will take you to a porn site. Compare that to a google search for "transgender" which gives you 10 out of 10 resource and support sites. There are terms I never thought would be acceptable. I never thought that gays would spin the term "queer" around, but they did, for the most part. A homophobic person has never called me a tranny to my face. I think they instinctively know that's a hornet's nest the don't want to kick. I know that a lot of people hate the term "sissy" but in my BDSM culture, it's so common I don't even think about it often. However, on the street and in the prison system, being called a "sissy" or "punk" is far worse than "tranny." If a transgendered sister calls me tranny, I don't even think about it. That being said, one might wonder if I think it's okay if another black person calls me the "N" word. It's not okay with me. I don't use the word even with the closest of my friends and family. In my community, everyone isn't exactly thrilled about the term "tgirl" either. About 10 years ago, an online friend of mine ran a site and group, both called TG/TS Woman. The late Roberta Angela Dee and I used to go back and forth about the term "tgirl" since she hated it being middle-aged. "Shemale" is strictly a porn term and one of the quickest ways to get on a transsexual's bad side is to use that word. A transsexual friend of mine once worked at a club in New Orleans where there were lots of transsexuals in attendance. Some guy walked up to her and said he wanted to get fucked by a shemale. She told him how much it would cost and took his money under the pretense that she was setting up a an encounter for him. She then had him kicked out of the club and told him, "There you go. You've just been fucked by a shemale." You really have to be careful what you say to people and the words you choose.

HW: You describe yourself at your site as being a "lifestyle Mistress". What exactly is a lifestyle Mistress and how does it play out in your personal and/or professional life?

MC: Being a lifestyle Mistress basically means I love doing everything an escort does, but I don't charge anyone. I have lots of friends who are escorts, but it's just not for me. I don't look down on it. I just know it would overwhelm me. There are ups and downs to prostitution and I'm pretty sure that the disadvantages would outweigh the money in my case. I'd probably end up depressed or in jail. My personal life and professional life are one in the same, but only recently. I worked in retail management most of my adult life, but now that I'm a webmaster and transitioning full time, I no longer live a double life.

HW: Are you into BDSM and roleplay? Do you have a favorite bondage website?

MC: I'd only known about the supeficial elements of BDSM until about five years ago like the fashion, imagery and myths about it. About four years ago, I was attending my local TG/TS support group and I became close friends with the leader whom I'll call L. She was a very conservative dressing pre-op transsexual I never would have guessed had been a professional Mistress. Her wife decided she couldn't deal with L's transition and when she needed a place to live, I invited her to stay at my loft with me until she got back on her feet. After a few weeks, we'd gotten pretty close and messed around in bed a few times. One night she spilled the beans about she and her ex having worked together as tag team Mistresses. Business was good as there weren't many transsexual/genetic women escort teams in Central Florida and most of their clients were male submissives. To make a long story short, L trained me first as a submissive an taught me how to dominate local submissive crossdressers and transvestites we'd meet online. She worked for a major communications corporation and was coming out full-time so she eventually decided to move to California. There’s very little protection from job discrimination in Florida so after six months, it was the right time for her to get a transfer and move on. I've done very little training since then, but I have big plans for the near future.

HW: I know that you're passionate about politics and volunteered for the Obama campaign. What issues are most important today for the t/s community from a legal and social standpoint?

MC: Obama supported gay rights during his Illinois Senate tenure and sponsored legislation in Illinois that would ban discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation. He also co-sponsored legislation to expand federal hate crimes laws to include crimes perpetrated because of sexual orientation and gender identity and he supports the Employment Non-Discrimination Act. He wants to repeal the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy and allow gays and lesbians to serve openly in the military and believes that gays and lesbians should have the same rights to adopt children as heterosexuals. The United States certainly isn't the most tolerant society for TS people, but it certainly isn't the most intolerant either. Obama's stance on LBGT rights is pretty progressive, so I think we'll see some real change soon. These legal issues and their effects will improve our social standing without a doubt in my mind. I keep up with politics mostly from television and that's all I watch on tv. I should have bet money that David Gregory would replace the late, great Tim Russert on "Meet The Press." I would have made a killing on that one.

HW: Most straight people know little, if anything, about transgendered people. I'll be honest and say that until I started writing adult web reviews, I had never seen any t/s material before, so it's new to me and I'm still learning. What's the biggest misconception or stereotype about t/s people?

MC: I think that the biggest misconception is that all full-time transsexuals do not feel like their transition will not be complete unless they have SRS (sexual reassignment surgery). I'm judged mostly by other transsexuals and many will not like what I'm about to say. I can't remember a single day wanting to have a vagina, of my own, that is. I'm bisexual so that being said, you know where I was going. Breasts however, are a different story. Mine are not all that big yet, but they're growing nicely and they're all mine. I'm considering an under-the-muscle boob job as I loathe ugly scarring. Bad boob jobs are sad and tragic to me and I feel horrible for women who've had lousy work done. Most transsexuals and genetic women I've spoken with the boob job stuff agree with me. Actually, ggs (short for genetic girls, stay with me now) pay me little mind and the ones who do find an interest in me are mostly bisexual. Bisexual women understand me more than straight women and vice-versa. I don't currently have a lot of masculine male friends at the moment, just a few I adore as platonic friends who flirt every now and then and that's fun and provocative. I do find lots of masculine men very attractive, but I haven't had a sexual experience with a guy who wasn't a crossdresser or transvestite. Most men interested in me are looking for sex and the funny thing about it to me is that they could care less if I'm a crossdresser, transvestite, transgendered or transsexual. It doesn't bother me at all, because not only do I know the way they think, I've lusted after them myself. In the heat of the moment, I was thinking with my cock, not with my brain. There's something about men a lot of folks don't like to hear, but I'm going to say it anyway. What most men care about when getting together with a pre-op or non-op tgirl for a one night stand is that she looks good. They do not care about what their status is as far as transitioning goes. They don't care if that person they're attracted to is a part-time crossdresser full-time transsexual. Here's a scenario. Two people who appear to both be women are at a night club, but only one is a woman (to me, anyone in transition is a true woman). One is a part time crossdresser who looks as good as Angelina Jolie and dressed to the nines. The other is in transition and dealing with weight issues and doesn't dress and groom herself very well. Most men will be attracted to the more physically attractive one at first. That's how the male brain works, like it or not. Also, most guys will not care if a crossdresser is even going to transition or not if sex is what they're after. Many assume that crossdressers, transvestites, transgenders and transsexuals are all birds of a feather anyway. Who looks the hottest is all that matters in a situation like the one I've just described. There are two questions I'm asked often about sexuality, not gender. People often confuse sexual issues with gender issues. Is the man gay if he's attracted to the crossdresser or transvestite? Is he gay if he's attracted to the transsexual? I've often seen men incredibly embarassed and unsettled when they found out that they were looking at was not what they thought they were looking at. If they were fooled, that doesn't count. If a man knows the person he's getting into bed with is a crossdresser or a transvestite, he's either bisexual or gay. If a man knows he's going to bed with a transsexual, he might be bisexual, but he's certainly not gay. Gay men are not interested in us sexually and no gay man likes dick so much that he's going to play with a tranny to get one. Correction, unless he's in a porn flick and getting paid for it.

HW: If you could write a script for a porn movie, what would your dream scenario be? What turns you on the most?

MC: Okay, here's a synopsis: A young male is at a Halloween party dressed as a female and makes a very appealing one. Another male sees him, thinks he's hot and starts hitting on him. They sneak off privately and the one dressed goes down on the masculine male and passes so well that the guy doesn't know he's not being sucked off by a woman. The guy getting his cock sucked is not having a homosexual experience as far as he knows and has no need to worry that he's gay or bisexual, but he does anyway when he finds out it wasn't a woman he was with. If he'd found out later that the person who gave him a blowjob were not a genetic woman and not transgendered, but simply wearing women's clothing as a costume and didn't think anything of the situation, he'd definitely be bisexual or gay. I think an interesting story could be told if the male who was dressed decided decided later that dressing was more than just a lark and that although he was comfortable with being bisexual or gay, he begins to wonder if he's a transsexual. Wendy Williams and Brittany Coxxx are AVN award nominees, transsexuals who lived as a gay males before transitioning full-time. This scenario can happen in real life. On to the stoyy. The masculine guy questions his sexuality, yet finally realizes he's still straight. A few years later, they meet again and the one who was dressed is on HRT, considering SRS. They find that there is chemistry between them and they try to make a relationship work. There's my transsexual porn movie with a plot; something you rarely see these days. Should I write the script before someone who reads this beats me to it and gets rich from my idea?

HW: I really admire your professionalism and work ethic. You're extremely prolific and your TS blogs (CaramelsTgirls.com and Caramelsgirls.com), are so hot and well-designed. When and why did you decide to focus your energies on blogging?

MC: Just like you had a gut feeling that ebooks were the wave of the future, I knew instinctively that blogging would be a big deal. I don't remember exactly when George W. Bush coined the term "blogosphere" but I knew then that blogging was about to split the sky wide open. I didn't have the skills, resources or models at my disposal to develop a great paysite, but I have a lot to say and know porn extremely well. I blame one of the reasons I'm such a pervert on the business men who threw their issues of Playboy, Penthouse and Hustler magazines out of the windows of the trains to NYC when I was a kid. Larry Flynt exposed me to my first transsexual porn star, Shannon, in a spread named "Fruit Of The Gawds." No other porn mag featured a ts before. While other kids had heroes who were athletes and movie stars, my idols were Hugh Hefner, Bob Gucionne and Larry Flynt. Now we're living in a digital age and the rest is history.

HW: I noticed that you said you're a frustrated chef and you like to eat healthy. You also don't smoke or drink. That dispels the idea that people in the adult industry are all a bunch of crazy partiers who don't care about their health or well being. Do you work out or follow a health regimen?

MC: I was wild as a kid and used to smoke and drink. I have an obsessive compulsive personality and once I start something, I have a hard time stopping. Besides, I'm a control freak and what do you get when you take the control from a control freak? A total nut job. I don't work out at a gym but exercise at home daily. When you spend as much time before a PC as I do every day (12 to 16 hours), you've got to get out and walk or run to stay in shape. I keep a basketball in my trunk at all times just in case I drive by a court and have some free time on my hands. I sucked at basketball camp in my teens and I'm always trying to better my game. Sorry if that blew my girlish image for anyone, but some girls got game too, or at least try to as in my case.

HW: I know how many long hours you spend on your blogs, but what do you do for relaxation just to chill out?

MC: I love to cook to unwind and I'm an avid reader. My specialty is barbeque and I always have to be in the middle of a book or sometimes two.

HW: I think you're a great writer because you have such a natural, flowing style, and you're totally willing to share some extremely personal and intimate experiences about your own sexuality and experiences growing up in a very graphic way - saying things that most people would hide or deny. Any plans for a book? Your life story is so fascinating! Who are some of your favorite authors, in erotica or other genres?

MC: I was an English major at N.U. in Boston after a year of not knowing what I was supposed to be doing with myself at The School of The Museum of Fine Arts, Boston. My favorite professor had her students write journals and share them with the class, basically blogging without a PC in front of you. I've been writing a semi-autobiography for years and hope to have it published in the Spring of 2009. My biggest influence is Anne Rice who's famous for her vampire novels, but also wrote erotica, "The Beauty Books" under the name A.C. Roquelaire. Rice was one of the few mainstream writers to include transgender themes in her work and to deeply explore androgyny. I admire her for that. I also love a good old fashioned mystery. I read current thrillers but that's because there aren't many writers like Agatha Christie anymore who write genuine mystery. Most of what's out there now is based on suspense and horrific imagery.

HW: Do you define yourself as a transsexual person or as a person who happens to be transsexual?

MC: I really prefer "person" first, but we have to compartmentalize each other in order to feel safe and distant. I'm a transsexual, but it's not something I spend a lot of time working out in my head at this point in my life. I'm middle-aged now, 44 years old, and too damn old to define myself to myself outside of simply I am what I am. I've felt for as long as I can remember that I should have been born female. Some transsexuals define themselves as trans lesbians. A few years ago, I had transsexual friend whom whenever she'd see another pretty ts she'd say, "I don't know if I want to fuck her or be her" and I'd always get a chuckle out of that. That brings us back to the paradox of "I couldn't find her, so I became her." That quote actually better fits a trans lesbian more than it fits a bisexual person like me, but I've said it and that's what I'm sticking with.

HW: You love fashion and couture. Who's your favorite designer?

That's a tough one. My all-time favorite design house is Chanel and I love what Karl Lagerfeld has done with it. My favorite designer today however would be Giorgio Armani. I also love Prada and for shoes and Christian Louboutin is another. I also love Louis Vuitton bags and luggage and La Perla lingerie. I used to work for Neiman Marcus for a few years and that company spoiled me. I've found that when you buy cheap clothing, they usually fall apart faster. On the other hand, I've worked closely with a lot of great tailors since I've had to size people at a glance and fit them for a living. That's when I learned that it's not all about labels and that fancy names don't always translate to quality. I learned clothing because it was my bread and butter and I sold to mostly wealthy people in a big hurry. Fashion was not just a passion for me, but a way of life.

HW: What are your professional goals for the future? Your blogs are really taking off and gaining more and more fans and traffic. Where do see yourself in a year?

MC: I want to have more financial freedom to travel the world and also to interview trail blazing transsexuals I look up to; not just in porn either. I don't want to be rich. I just to be comfortable and not to have to worry about money all the time. I didn't know what to do with myself as a fine artist and did the whole starving artist thing. What I do now with my writing is the only way I'll achieve the success I want. I'll be closer in another year and will have made more in a year than I ever made as a retail manager. But then, that's not saying much. In five years, I'll be where I need to be.

HW: You say at your Myspace site that you enjoy gg's (genetic girls), as well as males who identify as "tgirl", "crossdresser", or "transsexual". In your personal life, what do you seek in a partner? What type of person would be your ultimate partner and how do you approach the t/s issues and challenges when you first meet a new person?

MC: I'm just looking for someone who's honest and doesn't play games. It would be easier to have a significant other who's going through transitioning like me but I wouldn't rule out a part time tgirl. I've never dated a man who's completely masculine, but I wouldn't rule that out either. He's have to be very secure with himself though and not the jealous type because I go absolutely ga-ga over other girls. I'm not sure I could be involved with a masculine guy and not have an open relationship, but I could have a monogamous relationship with a cd tv tg or another ts for certain.

HW: Do people in the transsexual community view you as a role model? I know you devote time to helping others with transgendered issues. How do you help in that capacity?

MC: I'm not viewed as a role model and don't care to be. I do try to help others deal with their circumstances however, and this includes crossdressers and transvestites. Lots of transsexuals resent crossdressers and transvestites because the don't have to get their names legally changed. They don't have to fight with health care programs for HRT and surgeries. They don't have to convince a psychologist with a conflict of interest to write a letter authorizing surgeries. They don't have to fight their about changing their birth certificates and ID's. If someone is a cd or tv, you'll never know it when they're out in every day life in male mode, so they don't have to face the same job discrimination. If for any reason they should become a ward of the system, they don't have to worry about the health problems they'll have if cut off from HRT (hormone replacement therapy access). However, crossdressers often have problems many transsexuals will not have to face. Cds and tvs have to worry about losing their jobs if outed and facing possible divorce if their wives find out about their dressing. No one who was born male and dresses part-time or full-time as a female is going to have a walk through the park.

HW: You are such a cool person, and you seem really disciplined and controlled in the way you handle your business. I think your generous and helpful personality is a big reason why people respect you and enjoy associating with you, not just because you write hot sex! At the end of the day, how do you want people to perceive you? If you could choose one word to describe yourself, what would that be?

MC: Thanks for the kind words, Honey. One word? I'd like to think I didn't waste my life, so as corny as it sounds. I guess I'd have to say, "accomplished." Hopefully, I won't be remembered for just slinging smut, but that remains to be seen.

HW: You say, "a hero is a sandwich", but who are your heroes, who do you admire?

MC: My biggest hero is my mom. We get on each others nerves a lot but we both have very strong personalities. She used to be one of the most homophobic people I've ever known and completely out of touch with transgender issues I face, but she loves me unconditionally. She's elderly now and I do my best to take care of her.

HW: When you write a review of a website, in your opinion what makes a great site that you honestly feel you can recommend to your readers as being a good value for their hard-earned money, especially for your t/s readers and fans?

MC: A great website doesn't lead you to believe that you'll have full access to other sites when that access is limited. For instance, a popular website with a thirty day membership advertises access to thirteen other sites at $29.91 but a 2 day trial is only $1. Sounds too good to be true? The way things work for me is that if something sounds too good to be true, it usually is. Some sites limit what you can download with the trial option. Some websites record the amount of bandwidth you use and put a cap on it, which bars you from downloading more than what they want you to. Other sites make it clear that your access is restricted to show you what you are missing out on. The good news is that not only are the majority of sites out there to do great business with you, but also the credit card companies are willing to withdraw their service if they know that deceptive practices are at work. When I write my review, I don't just tell my readers about the content of the website, but I steer them away from traps like this. Then I break down the amount of content, update regularity and download speeds; the technical stuff. The way I review a transgender site is no different from the way I'd review a M.I.L.F. site, a transsexual midget site, or an interracial creampie site. The bottom line is always based on overall quality. What I bring to the table when reviewing a transgender site that a non-admirer cannot is a genuine respect for the subject. I can't tell you how many reviews I've read that begin with, "I'm not into shemales but..."etc. Maybe that's why people take my reviews seriously. I only write what I know. I don't try to take on gay male website reviews because I don't really undestand what I'd be reviewing. Just because many of my friends are gay males doesn't mean I can judge gay sex. Unless someone's got on some makeup and a dress, I'm out of my element and won't go near it.

HW: We're both adult web reviewers, so we watch a lot of porn. It seems that the t/s niche has grown more than almost any type of adult material out there. Why do you think this is happening? Is it just another way for the porn industry to cash in, or is it somewhat bringing more acceptance of the t/s community?

MC: Oh, sure it's just another way for the porn industry to cash in. I don't have a problem with that either. The transsexual flavor of the month right now is Kimber James, the first transsexual to be signed by a major talent agency, L.A. Direct Models. This might do nothing more than to drive up the rates for transsexual models and performers and that could either benefit them or backfire and leave them with less work. We'll have to see how this turns out, but the good thing is that on some level, it's certainly a breakthrough. I'm not sure how much this emergence of ts porn will bring acceptance however. The perception that a man is gay if he likes chicks with dick still persists, even though no one is gay in a male/transsexual relationship. Gay men are not interested in sex with transsexuals, but I'll bet nine times out of ten that if an straight man is caught by his friends with ts porn in his collection, they'll swear he's gay or bisexual. A man who is attracted to someone who identifies as a woman is still straight in my book whether she's pre-op, non-op or post- op.

HW: In your blog, you've said that most "tranny" porn reflects transgendered sexuality about as well as most girl/girl porn reflects lesbian relationships. Obviously, you don't have a high opinion of most of the material out there. Are there any worthwhile t/s websites or videos that you'd recommend or that you particularly dig?

MC: I don't think that a lesbian transgender website is coming up anytime soon. The top webmasters are saying there's not a big enough market for it and most transsexual models and performers are straight and have no desire to work with other transsexuals. There are a few and doing it well, especially in the Asian market but most men pay to see solo models and girl on guy action. I'm just glad that there's a surge in the femdom market and willing to wait until there's a call for more lezzie content.

HW: Who is your favorite t/s performer?

MC: Actually it's a tie for me between Allanah Starr and Vaniity. I think that Allanah is the sweetest girl out there and for an icon to be so kind to people, that's pretty amazing. She treats her fans with respect, promotes charities she loves passionately and helps other girls just coming into adult entertainment selflessly. Vaniity gets a bad rap for being a bitch because she often behaves as a vain, conceited person, but I've written about the way she possibly overcompensates for a painful past. Whether people like her or not, she's in my opinion the most beautiful transsexual in porn, hands down.

HW: What are the 2008 Tranny Awards? How can people nominate your blog, CaramelTGirls?

MC: Grooby Productions is the leading transgender adult website team. The owner, Steven Gallon started Shemale Yum over ten years ago and now has off-shoot websites of the same superior quality. The nomination process is now closed and I've got my fingers crossed that my site will be in the running. If not, I won't be all broken up about it. I've had a over a quarter million visits and lots of unique hits (the repeat visits that convert int sales) since I've begun blogging less than five months ago so if I get a nomination, CaramelsTGirls has already proven itself as a blog that's on its way. It's quite possible to make more as an affiliate than running a pay site. I get paid have of the signups of the paysites I promote with a very low overhead: domain name and hosting fees. I have none of the costs associated with shooting the models and no processing fees. That's why winning an award would be great but would have little effect on me one way or the other aside from being a nice selling point.
 

HW: Thanks so much for taking time from your busy schedule to share your views with XXXpwnage. With your positive attitude and honesty, not to mention sexy and hot blogs, you'll definitely have continued success in the adult industry and we'll be looking for a book from you one of these days, too! In the meantime, you can find the amazing Mistress Caramel online at CaramelsTGirls.com and CaramelsGirls.com and at MySpace.