Sadly, SalamiBrothers.com no longer exists. All related links have been removed from
this page, but the review will remain for reference purposes. XXX Pwnage 2009
Reviewed 22 November 2008
SalamiBrothers.com otherwise known as porn entertainers extraordinaire Johnny and
Tommy Salami - have arrived on the scene with their contribution to the porn comedy
niche, and I must confess to having a soft spot for dirty antics served up with a
laugh. These two wild and crazy guys are obviously frustrated comedians who said
to themselves, "hey, what the hell, let's put on a show that's part fucking, part
laugh track." And yes, the videos here do have a laugh track, spoofing the days of
television when audiences had to be told when to laugh. Add a dash of Cheech and
Chong, $1.98 sets from a low budget (or no budget) D movie, throw in Captain Save-A-Hoe
along with some wet and wild pussies gettin fucked and sucked in various wack scenarios
by the comedy cocks of Johnny and Tommy, and you've got the recipe for a Salami
Their motto is "Fresh Salami Served Daily"(not too difficult to figure out what kind
of salami they're referring to) and the site has been live for only a short while
as of the date of this review. If you're a chick who has been "salamied" by this
dynamic duo, you probably never quite forget it (or live it down, more likely!).
The site is still low on content and has some rough edges to work out, but the potential
exists nevertheless for a fun and entertaining experience as it develops. If nothing
else, some of the videos are good for a belly laugh with your frat buddies on a drunken
Saturday night. Or maybe you're just super lonely and want a chuckle after a bad
break-up. Whatever your reason for being here, let's venture into this weird little
corner of Pornoland. Don't be scared, I'll show you around!
The Home page sets the comic tone - their logo shows a babe dressed as Raggedy "Ass"
with her legs bent over her head like a contortionist (freakin hot pic, actually!),
a butt naked bride fleeing into a hippie-era VW van, a guy in a Dr Nasty fright wig
and a cute hottie at a lemonade stand. Our heroes, Johnny and Tommy, are shown with
their tongues strategically placed on the nipples of a pair of luscious boobs while
giving the Thumbs Up! Yeah, this is comedy porn central, all right.
The main navigation bar is divided into Home, Models, Images, Videos, Bonus Sites,
Latest Updates and Contact Us. Beneath that is a message from the Salami Brothers
asking that visitors bear with them as there might be technical glitches while things
are being ironed out. They also indicate that they have been shooting "tons" of new
updates and hope you stick around to see the new stuff. The good news is that while
you're waiting for the site to add new content, with a full membership here you'll
have access to nine bonus sites at the Inn of Sin network, including Backside Bonanza,
I Cant Believe She Fucked Me, My Deep Dark Secret, Fuck Me Filthy, Adult Cream Pie,
Cum Thristy Cougars and more. There is some initial confusion when clicking on "Bonus
Sites", as that is not where the links work. Click on Latest Updates and you'll find
them at the bottom of the page. That's an example of one of the little "glitches"
that the Salami Brothers need to iron out. Most likely the minor glitches will be
corrected as they expand.
On the Home page, you'll find the Latest Updates. There were four videos shown: Lemonade
Surprise, Russian Bride, Dr Nasty, and Captain Save A Ho. Each episode lists the
number of photos and the name of the starring model. Beneath that are the top rated
photo sets, Most Recent Episode Updates, Latest Models and Bonus Sites. On the left
hand side of the screen is a Coming Soon announcement about their online DVD and
sex toy store, a Browse All Models link, Top 10 Photo Sets, Top 10 Models and Top
10 Movies. So, they're certainly all set up for the new action coming down the pipeline.
Currently, the site contains six videos in total with photo galleries. Click on "Models"
and you'll see a link to each girl's video, as well as an Interview Video, Scene
Video (which is a link to the video again) and the Photo Gallery that goes with the
video. The girls featured thus far include Marie McCray, Stephanie Crane, Cristina
Cross, Bridgette B, Tia Cox and Tricia Ray.
To check out the comedy content here, I downloaded two videos and one model interview.
The Videos page shows a collection of all the videos and latest updates with a trailer,
plus 10 images for preview. "Granny In The Hospital", stars Bridgette B, as well
as Johnny and Tommy Salami, along with a couple of other amusing people, plus a wiener
dog named Doobie. Each video has a funny scene description.
Bridgette B is a newcomer to the adult biz and her inexperience showed a bit. I'm
a big fan of the naughty nursie routine, but in order for that to work, the actress
has to be into it, which unfortunately she didn't quite nail. Too bad - it could
have been freakin hilarious. However, you probably won't notice that shortcoming
too much while you're staring at her other assets. There are some clever moments
in this video. The Salami guys do have a certain funny flair. Gotta admit, a comic
porn duo is a unique addition to the scene out there. I won't give away the ending,
which was rather amusing. These videos have a "spoof" feel, tongue in ass cheek,
so to speak, (see, I can be a comic too, Salami Brothers!) and you have to take
that into account if you're into this genre and style.
I thought the second video, "Captain Save A Ho", was a better effort all around.
It featured hot porn babe Cristina Cross as the Ho waiting for salvation from her
evil porn agent, Robert Stinkyballs (whew!). She wore a short 70's style halter
dress and no panties. Nice! Cristina was more in tune with the comedy element of
her role and got into it. Again, I won't give details, but it did contain some
laughs. Pretty funny at times, actually. And in case you're wondering, yes, there
IS sex action. Of course, you'll need to deal with the gimmicks and costumes a bit,
as with any novelty site. But you will see these babes getting the brother's...
uh... salamis, in various ways and positions, including oral, getting and receiving.
Running time was around 20 minutes. In looking at the other galleries, The Dr. Nasty
pics showed some glass dildo action and finger in the ass. So, there's a variety
of stuff going on here and judging from these wack guys, I'm sure they have more
planned for the future. Regarding updates, at this point, it's not clear what their
update schedule is.
Finally, I watched the Bridgette B interview, primarily because she is a new girl
on the scene and I like to review newcomers. It was a brief Q&A in which she gives
her background (she's from Barcelona, Spain and attended a girl's boarding school
- how hot is that?). The interviews are a nice touch that you won't want to miss.
Videos and interviews are available for download in two formats: dial-up connection
and high speed connection in Windows WMV. Not a lot of options for now, but it's
enough to get the job done for most people's needs. The video quality was average.
The audio could use improvement here and there.
Click on the "Images" link and you'll be taken to the Gallery. Click on any image
and that will take you to the full gallery for that video. The galleries contain
100+ excellent quality and large 1000 x 666 size pics – unfortunately not available
in zip files.
Support consists of a "Contact Us" email link for Tommy Salami. I couldn't find any
other general help or FAQ link. Customer Service is provided by CCBill.
So, what's the final verdict on this comedy porn site from SalamiBrothers.com? The
Pros: Entertaining destination for those seeking a refreshing change of pace from
the usual porn fare, with more content promised. The Salami Brothers definitely are
funny guys who want to make you laugh and enjoy your time here. I feel they're committed
to providing members with a gonzo, wack experience from their point of view as porn
insiders/performers, while banging the hottest babes they can find to share in their
playtime. With full membership, you have access to nine bonus sites from the Inn
of Sin network. The Cons: This is a brand new site, low on content, a few glitches
in navigation, could use improvement in the video/audio quality in some areas. If
you're game, cum on in and get your Fresh Salami Served Daily! This is a site to
keep your eye on if you're into laughs with your humping!
Membership details: $24.95 first 30 days recurring; $29.95 30 days non-recurring
one time charge; $59.95 90 day non-recurring one time charge; $34.95 1-900 telephone
billing, non-recurring charge.
Membership includes access to the Inn of Sin network with thousands of high quality
images and hundreds of hours of XXX high quality video in WMG and MPG format.