Reviewed 23 August 2008
I would like to pretend that the Webmaster here at XXX Pwnage FORCED me to do a review
of NanaFunk.com, but I might as well confess: it was all my idea. I have no excuse,
other than to say I love freak shows and Nana Funk certainly puts on a good one!
Well, where to begin? Let's just say there's no 2257 problems at this site, 'cause
these broads are all wayyyyyyy past 18! Nana herself is 75. I realize that most guys
barf at the thought of watching fat, wrinkled old women fucking and giving head without
their dentures, but if you can't handle it, don't worry, nobody's gonna make you
watch it. Unless, that is, you secretly want to?! There is a market for this stuff,
otherwise it wouldn't be out there. So, let's take a look.
Nana Funk is one of the bonus sites available to members of the Monster network
which includes 30+ sites, many of them with unique fetish content not available elsewhere,
including Tranny Abuse, Preggo Abuse, We Fuck In Public and many more.
Personally, I thought Nana, who is from Canada, was quite freakin' entertaining.
Gee, I hate to say it, but I also think she has a major screw loose - big surprise
there. But in my book, that adds up to a one-of-a kind porn experience. Sort of like
going to the porn circus and she's in the center ring. It's a train wreck, but it's
still way weird, so in the highly unlikely event that you ever tire of watching young,
beautiful, tight, hot, slick porn chicks fornicating, perhaps you can refresh yourself
with a dose of Nana Funk. A change of pace, eh?
Nana speaks with a pronounced accent which sounds French Canadian so at times it's
a little difficult to understand her. But you probably won't be paying much attention
to her words of wisdom and instead will be staring in disbelief as she does such
outrageous things as: masturbating with a hammer (the handle end), a lit candle,
a baby carrot, a pickle, and other odd items. She also gets fucked although she seems
to have a preference for using big dildos and objects on herself. A male voice off
camera makes the smut even smuttier as he prods Nana to do nastier things and she
often cackles like a loon while making a variety of strange comments. Good times!
When he lit the candle in her pussy, he is heard saying, ‘The last thing we need
in here is a fire!’ My sentiments exactly! Nana does a particularly freaky scene
fucking a black girl with a strap on and a dildo. Each video has a good descriptive
scene caption so you know just what wild antics to expect, for example: ‘Meet Teese,
she has a perfect ass and the pinkest pussy I ever saw. This is her very first lesbian
experience... You'll want to turn down your volume for this one because we don't
show each other any mercy while pounding each other's holes with a monstrous strap-on!’.
I can vouch for the volume warning - the black chick moans like she's gonna have
a seizure - maybe she was freaked out from the weirdness of Nana fucking her with
a big dildo? It was oddly arousing (wow, did I really just admit that?). You can
even see clips of a documentary that was produced about Nana in Canada by their only
adult production House 007 Erections. So, there ya go! She's documentary worthy!
And you thought she was just a crazy old slut!
The site has apparently been online since around 2004, and the last update I saw
that featured Nana herself was in 2004, so it's unclear whether she's still making
movies. But there's a body of her work here (wrinkled, flabby and disgusting though
it may be!), probably more than your stomach can handle for the rest of your mortal
Go to Nana Funk Life and you'll find 40+ videos available in WMV format with earlier
ones also in RealPlayer. The latest updates were in 2007 (not many updates here unfortunately)
are in the center area of the site and there are screencaps and picture galleries
to go with some of the videos (not all though). The videos are split into scenes,
with each running about 5-6 minutes in length. Most of the movies are about 20-30
minutes long. The collection of slut grannies (or ‘guest models’ as they call them)
are all well beyond MILF status, ranging in age from their mid-50's all the way up
to 85+ years old. There was one lady there named Candy Vegas who didn't look half
bad (kinda milfy), so it's not all horrifying! But most are definitely oldsters and
well past their sell by date.
The scene featuring an 85 year-old granny named Jules opens with a close-up of a
set of dentures in a glass. Jules comes into the nursing home using her walker. She's
all dressed up in long black dress and pearls - she's also very pissed off. She demands
that her gigolo tell her where her teeth are, as he's been entrusted to take care
of her. She's in the mood to suck cock, so that's precisely what she does - minus
her teeth, so he gets a nice gumming. I almost passed out watching this, but hey,
that's what makes Nana Funk one of the freakiest sites around.
Nana Funk includes links to XXX DVD's, live feeds, and links to other areas of the
Monster network, and as with all bonus sites like this, if your mind just can't handle
Nana and her outrageous old gal pals, you can always sample a large amount of other
material here that will take the sting out of this experience! Or maybe you'll quite
enjoy your time here if this is your thing. Okay, I did enjoy it. There, I admitted
it again! Yes, it's dirty work reviewing sites like Nana Funk, but hey, somebody's
gotta do it!
Membership details: A 1 day trial will set you back just $1, whereas 30 days $29.97
and three months a reasonable $59.97.